Comparing yourself to others can be good or bad. On one hand, it can motivate you and inspire you, but it can also leave you jealous and lower your self esteem. Comparing is inevitable, and if we go through life forcing ourselves to only focus on what’s ours, we can find ourselves in another type of unhealthy pattern. Let’s explore the differences between healthy and unhealthy comparisons so you can feel empowered to stay on the positive side of life.
When we notice something about someone else that we wish we had, instead of feeling “less than”, we can focus instead on the “yes, when”.
For example, if I’m watching someone’s videos on social media, and they look so much more put together, they have a great flow, their video editing is awesome, I could focus on what I don’t have and what is “less” about my videos. I might even start disliking them for being so “fake” and for putting their content out “just for money”. I would definitely start feeling bad about my lack of ability and my appearance on my videos.
Instead, I can focus on the “yes” about their videos. Yes, I like that they dress up. Yes, I like that they work hard on their content so it flows well and looks put together. Yes, I see their effort as authentic desire to serve and I want to be seen that way as well. I can then learn about the things they are more skilled at and bring some of those skills to my own videos. This is the “when” in the “yes, when”. WHEN I learn more about video editing, I can have smoother more put together content. WHEN I dress up for my videos, I can look put together too.
It’s human nature to compare ourselves, but it’s what we do when we recognize we are making those comparisons that matters. I like “less than” versus “yes, when”, because it rhymes and is easy for me to remember. Try it out, and let me know if you start seeing a positive shift in your mindset.